Anonymous has left a new comment on the post "HOW DO YOU MEASURE YOUR SELF-WORTH?":Reminded me that some people live in an alternate universe, completely unfamiliar to me. Not from my blog.
I just stumbled on your blog and I think it's great. Everything you're writing about has happened to me too so I've got to believe that it isn't you but rather it's the men you're to whom you're attracted. I'm the same way...I have typically been the type of person who quickly dismisses a guy when I don't find him super attractive from the very beginning. However, I'm learning that sometimes the guys we pass up rather quickly are the ones that treat us the best. Don't get me wrong, I have not lowered my standards and do not date just anyone. However, I look to more than just looks now. I look for great conversation and a connection. I don't know about you but after being with someone that shows me respect, doesn't stand me up, stays true to his word and so many other great qualities I find myself becoming attracted after spending a bit of time with them. For instance the guy I'm with now is not someone I typically would have dated in the past. I can't begin to tell you how many times I would tell my girlfriends about things he would do that I found to be "strange." Little things such as taking me to a paint class on one of our first dates (none of the other guys I've been out with have even suggested that!) and during that date he noticed paint about to drip on me and wiped it away so it wouldn't get on my clothes. That swift move by him was so alien to me and I felt like all the other women were just staring at us! After talking about it to my friends every single one of them thought it was the sweetest thing he could do. I had to do a lot of self talk to remind myself that I am worthy of someone who treats me this way. All the men I've dated before were bastards...all treating me the same you've described in your past blogs. I realize now that I allowed them to treat me that way.
So how do I measure my self worth? I measure it in how I allow others to treat me. I no longer am I immediately drawn to an attractive man...who by the way are 99.5% of the time narcissistic liars...I wait for them to show me who they really are by their actions. Words just don't cut it anymore. I let them pursue me and let me just say it's definitely different than a game of cat and mouse. You can find a lot out about a man by just sitting back and watching how he interacts with you when he's interested. I'm worth more...and so are you. Hold out for someone who will treat you the way you want to be treated and make no concessions. You'll see your self worth will be defined more than just outward beauty.