High Tech Meets Bad Taste

Shanghai ATM

Stopped by the ATM this evening to deposit a check and get some cash. The picture is very similar to the one I used, except this one is in Shanghai. I went to the one located at my credit union in the probably mistaken belief that a check deposited there would get credited to my account sooner than if I used an ATM somewhere else. It's a drive up unit and there are a couple of clowns in the car in front of me. I don't what they are doing, but it takes them a really long time. The driver reaches out and punches a button and then they put their heads together presumably to figure out their next move, whereupon the driver reaches out and punches another button. Eventually they get it sorted out and drive off.

Now it's my turn. There is a car behind me so I want to be efficient about this, I don't want to be the fool who can't figure out how to use the ATM. Wouldn't want to make anyone have to wait, I mean, that would be rude. So the pressure is on.

This is a new machine, different from the one that was here last time I was here. There is no envelope dispenser. Well, let's see what happens. I punch in my request and out slides an envelope. I take the envelope and the machine starts beeping. Put the check in and, as much as I detest it, lick the foul tasting adhesive, seal the envelope and give it back to the machine. The beeping stops, the machine is happy. What about my cash? Looks like I have to run another transaction. Put the card in the slot. It won't go in. What's wrong? Do I have it backwards, or upside down or something? Try again, still won't go. What's the deal? Okay, maybe it just isn't ready. Wait for the welcome screen to show up. Screen changes, try again, still no go. One more time. There it goes, finally.

I pull out to the street still with this horrible taste of mucilage in my mouth. I open the door to spit to try and get rid of this taste, but as I lean out the side, the seatbelt retractor locks up and arrests my motion and the blob hits the door sill. Great, now I've got a mess to clean up. So that was my experience at the ATM.

On the way home I pass a mini-van hauling a new mattress home from Costco on the roof of his van. He's driving about half the speed limit. No problem. I take the most direct route home on the streets with the 35 MPH limit. I'm on the last leg of my route and this stupid mini-van pulls out in front of me! He took the long, slow, 25 MPH route, and he got here first. Man, I must not be living right.


Update March 2016 replaced missing picture.