We're goin' to da mattresses

Casper American

What is it with mattresses? Back in the day, it didn't seem like they were such a big deal. People had them, there were always plenty to go 'round, didn't seem like they were all that important. Nowadays it seems like everytime I turn around I'm shelling out a big wad of cash for another friggin' mattress. Maybe that's one of the little details about fatherhood they neglect to mention when you become a man. It's just one of the those things you're supposed to know and accept without complaint. Kind of like women and birthin' babies. Guess I should shut up now.

     Anyway, older son just bought another one. This one is memory foam and latex, not like the innerspring mattresses we've been using since forever. I did have a foam mattress in college and a waterbed for about ten years. They worked well enough at the time, but the foam eventually collapsed and the waterbed got to be a nuisance. So, back to innersprings, until today.

Wooden Slat, Metal Frame Queen Mattress Platform

    He needed a frame as well, but all the bed frames you see in stores seem to be designed to look pretty, not to actually hold a mattress, and when your quarters are tight, you don't want a lot of extraneous stuff taking up space just to look pretty. Found this one at Sears and I thought, cool, we can just go by and pick it up. Not so fast bucky, it's "not available in any stores", you have to order it and it gets shipped to you from some anonymous warehouse in lower slobovia. I think this is an indicator of the way things are going in this country, retailwise. The only stuff you are going to find in actual stores is 

• stuff people want right now, or
• stuff people want to actually to experience (see, touch, smell) before they buy it.

Stuff that is purely functional is going to come via a truck, or a drone. If you need it right now, it's because you failed to plan ahead, a common American trait.

P.S. Casper has promised me $50 for every mattress this blog post sells. Plus they gave me a picture of a pretty girl.

P.P.S. Title source.

Update February 2016. Replace missing picture because stupid Blogger lost it.