Car Trouble

Edsel Pushbutton Transmission Selector

The kids, well, I call them 'the kids'. They're adults, but they're only half my age, so I call them 'the kids'. Anyway, they went to a concert the other night in downtown Portland. On the way they stopped to pick up a friend at the Sunset Transit Center. Their friend's car had a dead battery, so when they left the concert at 2AM they called the automobile insurance company's roadside assistance program. The operator promised that someone would be there in an hour, but they didn't get there until three hours later. What? Tow truck drivers sleep? Who knew?

She-who-must-be-obeyed is in Iowa this weekend. This morning her car wouldn't start, so she called me for my expert advice. Talking to her about the car I find out that there is no ignition lock. There is only a key fob and a START button, which also functions as a STOP button. Anyway, she notices that she didn't put the car in PARK last night. Now back in the good old days when cars were steely and men were manly and wimmen folk didn't drive, you had to put the car in PARK before you could lock the ignition and remove the key. That was kind of a handy safeguard. A whole bunch of somebodies must have been asleep at the wheel to let this kind of obvious flaw out the door. I'm so glad we've got a safety czar to keep an eye on things like this. Friggin moron.