Starting the Car

2015 Chevrolet Colorado Dashboard

The procedure for getting in my car, starting it and getting going is a little different now than the way it used to be. In the old days, I would:

• Get my key ring out of my pocket. My keys were all metal and were all on a single key ring.
• Select the correct key, insert it in the lock on the car door and turn to unlock the door.
• Open the door
• Get in the car
• Put the key in the ignition lock
• Turn the key and start the engine
• Close the door
• Buckle the seat belt
• Put the transmission in drive
• Drive away
• Turn on the radio

Nowadays:

• Get the key fob with the attached key out of my pocket
• Press the button on the fob to unlock the car
• Open the door
• Get in the car
• Close the door
• Put the key in the ignition
• Get my phone out of my pocket
• Plug stereo cable into my phone
• Dial up YouTube music on my phone
• Press the play button
• Turn the volume on the phone up 
• Acknowledge the warning about excessive volume
• Finish turning the volume on the phone all the way up 
• Stash the phone in the drink holder
• Buckle the seat belt
• Turn the key and start the engine
• On the cars control panel, turn the volume up to a comfortable level 
• Put the transmission in drive
• Drive away

There a couple of reasons for the difference. In the old days there was always a question of whether the junker I was driving was going to start. Don't bother doing anything more than the bare essentials before the engine is started. We've moved past that, but now we have a bleeping alarms going off any time the computer isn't happy, so the order I have developed is to ensure that I won't be disturbed by those mother loving cheeping chirpers. Don't put the key in the ignition until you have closed the door, otherwise you'll get bonged. Don't buckle your seatbelt before you get your phone out or you'll be fighting the seatbelt. Don't turn the key in the ignition before you buckle your seatbelt or you'll get kabonged.

I don't carry my phone in my hand because I need one hand for the key and one hand for the door latch. Trying to do two things with one hand increases the chances of dropping something, something that will inevitable fall through a sewer grate and lead to much misery and teeth gnashing. I try and avoid those kind of situations.

On the upside, I get a decent selection of music, uninterrrupted by ads.