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Friday, December 26, 2014

Airlines

What is wrong with airline companies? I mean nothing they do makes any sense. They don't make any money. If you look at their history, overall, they have lost more money than they have made. So why do they even bother? It could be that they are getting funds from other places besides their customers. The government could be subsidizing them for their own nefarious purposes, or the aircraft manufacturers could be giving them kickbacks so they will continue to buy airplanes. Or maybe there is some subset of rich guys who just feel compelled to own an airline, no matter what the cost. Kind of like some of the guys who own professional sports franchises. It doesn't matter if it makes any money or not as long as they are in the game. Can't win if you don't play.
    Our flight from Atlanta to Buenos Aires was aboard a Boeing 767 Dreamliner. What a misnomer. A sardine can would be a more appropriate label. I just received a request from the airline company to complete a survey regarding my recent flight.  This how it starts out:

  1. How would you rate your on-board greeting from the flight attendant (e.g., welcomed with a smile at the aircraft boarding door, smile during service delivery)? 
  1. How would you rate the helpfulness and courteousness of the flight attendants (e.g., answering questions, offering assistance)? 
  1. How would you rate the timeliness and appropriateness of the information provided by the flight attendants (e.g., flight delays were communicated and updated)? 
  1. How would you rate the availability of the flight attendants (e.g., responded promptly to call bells, walked through the cabin enough)? 
  1. How would you rate the professional image of the flight attendants (e.g., personal appearance is well kept, uniform is neat and clean, professional demeanor)? 
Are you freaking kidding me? You lock me in a telephone booth size cell, wait, no, make that a coffin size cell for ten hours and you want me to evaluate my jailers on the pleasantness of their demeanor and the neatness of their attire? FOAD Y W MF.

If you are going to lose money on your airline, and we have already established that you are, is it really necessary to make the rest of us suffer along with you? Give us a little more room, for Pete's sake. That way at least when you go bankrupt people will remember you fondly instead of thinking good riddance to those worthless conniving scumbags.

Meanwhile I think the flight attendants might have a case with OHSA over the width of the aisles. It might mean passengers would be squeezed a little tighter, but at least you would be able to walk to your seat like a normal person instead of having to slither like a snake.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Makes you long for "the good old days" when flying wasn't that cheap and the business was more regulated, doesn't it? When one ate more-or-less real meals off of real china with metal utensils? When people wore something other than flip-flops and cutoffs and barely-there tops? When the average person weighed 60 pounds less than today's average person?

I'm making up my "facts" as I go along; but, it really was much more pleasant flying 40-50 years ago. Not as safe, but more pleasant.
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