Apple Pie Moonshine

Brody's Apple Pie Moonshine

Saw this at the liquor store yesterday evening. Shades of Justified. I had forgotten the name of the show, but it only took a few key words (TV, man with a hat, Kentucky) for the cashier to come up with it, whereupon we enjoyed a few moments of fond recollection.

Mags Bennett (Margo Martindale)

The King is Dead, Long Live the Dwarf

We watched the first three seasons of Game of Thrones last winter (a year ago). Since then we watched House of Cards with Kevin Spacey & Robin Wright, and Justified, all of which we enjoyed tremendously. I liked Justified so much I even broke down and paid extra to watch the latest season. Producers are spawn of the devil. Don't they know we deserve to watch everything they produce - all the time - for free? They suck you in with free teasers and then when they've got you hooked, they reel in your wallet.

We also tried Revenge and Scandal but they didn't quite cut the mustard. We also tried Breaking Bad, but we failed to connect. Don't know why. Too close to home maybe.

We continue to watch The Good Wife, but we are all caught up and have to wait for the next episode. Curses. I hate waiting. We used to be dedicated followers of CSI (the original Las Vegas based series), but it hasn't been the same since Gil left. The new lead investigator (the former Cheers bartender) just doesn't do it for me. Probably because he's not Gil.

So we've exhausted our supply of super-dooper crime series, and since our resident hacker has departed we no longer had access to Game of Thrones, so I finally broke down and subscribed to HBO. It's going to cost me $100 for the first year, after that it doubles. HBO has a new on-demand feature that we can get through our Roku box, but you need a subscription to HBO to use it. Bah and humbug. These dang subscriptions are piling up. I need to cancel some of them.

Game of Thrones spoiler (if the title hasn't given it away already. We are one episode from being caught up): Joffrey the malevolent gets his comeuppance. I would have preferred to have him stabbed a thousand times and then cut up into little bits but we can't always get what we want. It did look to be an unpleasant experience, though he didn't suffer nearly long enough. I was surprised as this show seems to thrive on showing just how unpleasant people can be and he was among the best (worst) at this, I thought the producers would keep him around forever. Ah well, nothing lasts forever. Now Tyrion is on trial and we don't know if he is going to survive this ordeal or not. On one hand he is the best person in the entire show, and he didn't do it (commit this particular murder), at least not that we know of. On the other hand, maybe he is negotiating with the producers and if they can't come to terms, well, off with his virtual head. Also, Cersei, Joffrey's mother, Tyrion's sister, wants him dead, and she generally gets what she wants.

Computer Business Dream

Because Chillicothe, Misery, is 500 miles west of Dayton, Ohio. I had never heard of Chillicothe, Missouri before, but I had heard of Chillicothe, Ohio. Don't know as I've ever been there.

I am traveling cross-country, eastbound. I think I have been driving, but the actual traveling doesn't enter into the story. I am sitting in a largish office with several other men. We are sitting in office chairs and there are desks here and there. We all seem to be looking in the same direction, out the window, or at a TV set, but whatever it is must not be very interesting because it does not even register. The men are all dressed like truck drivers or farmers, dungarees and flannel shirts, no business suits or ties. We are chatting amiably when a call comes in over the radio. Somebody's car has gone in the ditch in Dayton (Ohio) and they need some help. One them picks up the microphone and cracks wise, something about how we are not going to be able to do anything about it on account of we're in Harlan County (state garbled). It's not Kentucky, home of the television series Justified, because we are 500 miles west of Dayton. He's cracking wise because it's a real fluke to get a radio call from 500 miles away. There must be a zillion tow trucks closer to them than we are.
    Now a phone call comes in from Eula about how somebody's computer has crashed and what are we going to do about it. Now it's my turn to crack wise and I say it's going to cost $10,000 a week and it's going to take two weeks because it's just as far as the car in the ditch, so it's going to take a week to get there and a week to get back, and fixing the computer it going to be some kind of nightmare because that's the way computers always are. I'm cracking wise, but nobodies laughing, they are all nodding their heads as if I just offered the wisdom of the ages.
    I am perplexed by their reaction and try to lighten things up by explaining that I would carry a PC over there in a truck and bring up the Windows calculator program. One guy smiles, but then turns to his compadres and they discuss the wisdom of my original proposal. Turns out this is not a trucking company but a computer company that has a few dozen clients for their accounting software package and a two week visit to a customer and a $20,000 bill for service is pretty much standard procedure, though maybe a little longer and a little higher than typical.
    Now Eula shows up. He is a small, dark skinned man wearing gray coveralls. Looks like I am going with him to take care of this customer's computer problem. Huh.

Shopping Mall Dream

 

I wanted a big pillow and my wife told me about this really good deal at a big department store at the mall. She was even able to give me specific directions to the particular spot in the store, something about where the big chute dropped stuff from the upper floors. So I knew what I wanted, and I knew where it was, all I had to do was get there.
    When I got to the mall entrance I noticed a small door off to the side. It was about half the height of a normal door. I wondered what it was for. It was ajar, so I pulled it open and looked in and saw a wide, painted wood floor, like you might see in the shipping department of an old business. The floor was empty, but just past it I could see people doing something.
    I went in the entrance and I see an opening to another area I hadn't noticed before, so I take a look. It's a largish room, maybe 40 feet square and there are a bunch of people working on shoes. One of them looks at up and tells me that this is the shoe factory. Okay then.
   I go on my way and I expect to be passing through a hobby shop, because that's how I remember the mall being laid out, but no, it's some kind of restaurant. Apparently they specialize in big hamburger steaks, like one pound. There are platters of them here and there, some with ketchup, some without. The place is dark, kind of reminds me of Limehouse's backwoods barbeque joint on the TV series Justified. As I am leaving I notice that they also specialize in fruit pies.
    I wander vaguely through the mall for a bit trying to find the pillow, but no luck. I eventually find myself going through another restaurant on my way out the door. My memory is fading on this one, but it had some kind of folksy, country theme to it.
    I have left the building and I encounter a woman wearing a wireless headset who asks me what I thought of the restaurant and I told her I hadn't eaten there, whereupon she starts telling me about how great it is and how I ought to try it, but I am not interested and keep walking.

The White Ghetto

An excellent story about Appalachia in National Review Online. I would have stolen the whole thing but it's a little long. My wife and I started watching Justified recently, which is set mostly in Kentucky, so we have a little overlap here. Via View From The Porch.