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Sunday, January 15, 2012

Technology Marches On

Good: a neighbor underwent surgery to repair a hernia. Afterwards they gave her (yes, her. No, I didn't know women could get hernias either) a bag of novacaine to wear. It's plugged into an IV that goes right to the site of all the trauma. I imagine the idea is that by stopping the pain at the source, you don't need to take as much oral pain medication, which would affect your whole body.

Bad: Elliot drives his Honda over the top of Portland's West Hills. It's downhill so he decides to coast. He puts the transmission in neutral. That works for a while, but eventually the hill flattens out and he needs the engine again, so being a little spacey (it's been a hard day / week / life), he forgets about being in neutral and simply presses the resume button on the cruise control. The engine immediately goes to 9,000 RPM. Only Elliot's panicked response saves the motor from self-destructing. Come on Honda Motor Company, your car is loaded with sensors. Why does your computer not check to see whether the transmission is in gear before flooring the accelerator?

Bad: I called a local pizza franchise last night to order a pizza and they've got a new Robo-Cop automatic phone menu system. "Press one to order..." so I do and I am connected to a guy who tells me he is at this pizza joint downtown. Downtown? I don't think the shop I am trying to get a hold of is downtown, so I ask for clarification. Well, he tells me, we have two downtown shops, one in Edmonton and one in Calgary... Yeah, okay, I think somebody got their wires crossed when they installed Mr. Robo-Cop. Edmonton and Calgary are in Alberta, Canada and are over 500 miles away.

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