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Saturday, March 22, 2014

Computer Business Dream

Because Chillicothe, Misery, is 500 miles west of Dayton, Ohio. I had never heard of Chillicothe, Missouri before, but I had heard of Chillicothe, Ohio. Don't know as I've ever been there.

I am traveling cross-country, eastbound. I think I have been driving, but the actual traveling doesn't enter into the story. I am sitting in a largish office with several other men. We are sitting in office chairs and there are desks here and there. We all seem to be looking in the same direction, out the window, or at a TV set, but whatever it is must not be very interesting because it does not even register. The men are all dressed like truck drivers or farmers, dungarees and flannel shirts, no business suits or ties. We are chatting amiably when a call comes in over the radio. Somebody's car has gone in the ditch in Dayton (Ohio) and they need some help. One them picks up the microphone and cracks wise, something about how we are not going to be able to do anything about it on account of we're in Harlan County (state garbled). It's not Kentucky, home of the television series Justified, because we are 500 miles west of Dayton. He's cracking wise because it's a real fluke to get a radio call from 500 miles away. There must be a zillion tow trucks closer to them than we are.
    Now a phone call comes in from Eula about how somebody's computer has crashed and what are we going to do about it. Now it's my turn to crack wise and I say it's going to cost $10,000 a week and it's going to take two weeks because it's just as far as the car in the ditch, so it's going to take a week to get there and a week to get back, and fixing the computer it going to be some kind of nightmare because that's the way computers always are. I'm cracking wise, but nobodies laughing, they are all nodding their heads as if I just offered the wisdom of the ages.
    I am perplexed by their reaction and try to lighten things up by explaining that I would carry a PC over there in a truck and bring up the Windows calculator program. One guy smiles, but then turns to his compadres and they discuss the wisdom of my original proposal. Turns out this is not a trucking company but a computer company that has a few dozen clients for their accounting software package and a two week visit to a customer and a $20,000 bill for service is pretty much standard procedure, though maybe a little longer and a little higher than typical.
    Now Eula shows up. He is a small, dark skinned man wearing gray coveralls. Looks like I am going with him to take care of this customer's computer problem. Huh.

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