Briar Patch

About a month ago darling daughter was out picking blackberries for her food class at U-dub when her brand new and very fancy cell phone fell out of her pocket and into the blackberry bush. She was standing on the top of embankment that was covered with blackberry bushes, so when the phone fell into the bush, it also started sliding down the bank. She made a valiant effort to recover the phone, but each attempt to reach it caused it to become dislodged and slide farther down the bank.

I, being Master Of The Universe and a legend in my own mind, bestirred myself to attempt recovery of this wayward device. I was in Seattle this weekend and my daughter showed me where the unfortunate accident had taken place. She showed me the person sized hole she had made in the top of the briar patch attempting to retrieve the phone, and then she went on her way. She is not big on futility.

I attempted to enlarge the hole and work my way down, but I am trying to work in a very awkward position, sitting crouched over, cutting at my feet. The bank is very steep and about twenty five tall. There is nothing to support me. I go down some stairs to the roadway at the bottom of the bank and attempt to cut a path upwards through the briars. I make better progress this way, but after an hour I am worn down, not to mention having acquired numerous scratches all over my forearms.

So. If you are looking for a Star Trek communicator, or just a treasure hunt, feel free to attempt recovery of this prize. I would recommend an assortment of longish extension ladders, a gasoline powered weed wacker equipped with a brush blade and a suit of kevlar armor. A climbing rope, a stake to attach it to, a pair of clippers and a callous disregard for thorns ripping your flesh might also do the trick.

The briar patch in question is alongside the Burke Gilman trail very near Eastern Avenue North. Alongside the trail, starting from the Northeast, there is a section of tall bushes/trees, then about 100 feet of grass verging on the blackberry bushes, then another section of tall bushes/trees. The stairs to the lower roadway (North Northlake Way) are about 100 yards Southeast along the trail. On the other side of Northlake Way is a boat storage yard with racks for storing small power boats. The spot should be easily recognizable by the person size hole in the bush at the top, and a coffin sized hole at the bottom.


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Should anyone recover this phone I would be willing to shell out a couple of bucks to get it back. Will it even work after being outdoors for all this time? Good question.